What Hurts The Most
by Megs6292
Summary: What happens when it takes EJ getting shot for Sami to realize she loves him?


A/N: This is a challenge that was over at the EJ an Sami board.

* * *

_I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house  
That don't bother me  
I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out  
I'm not afraid to cry every once in a while  
Even though going on with you gone still upsets me  
There are days every now and again I pretend I'm ok  
But that's not what gets me_

Sami sat silently in the waiting room of Salem University Hospital. She had just watched Tony shoot EJ without thinking twice about it and just to think, an hour earlier she had thought it was the end of the world because Lucas left her when he found out she had met with EJ a day earlier to discuss the letters between Santo and Colleen. But as soon as she watched Tony shoot EJ any pain she felt over Lucas was replaced with the pain of her children never knowing their father because of his brother's hatred. Or dare she even think it…The pain of losing EJ and him not being around for her anymore. Even though she had started to hate him at one time he was the one person that had believed in her and supported her the way her family never had. She didn't want to lose that. Sami closed her eyes as she listened to the rain pound against the hospital windows. She shuddered as she remembered what happened…

_"Samantha," Tony greeted her as she entered the abandoned warehouse all the while still holding EJ at gun point._

_She didn't say anything she just gave him a cold stare as her eyes wandered over to EJ._

_Her eyes locked with EJ's. She saw his eyes go from cold and distant to concerned and loving._

_"Samantha," EJ said softly._

_"What's going on," She asked._

_"You need to leave…Now!" EJ said sternly to get his point across._

_Sami shook her head stubbornly._

_"No,"_

_EJ started to say something but before he could say anything to convince her otherwise Tony interjected._

_"Obviously Sami wants to stay so she'll just have to stay and what happens,"_

_With that Tony pulled the trigger on the gun before EJ could move._

Sami was jolted out of her thoughts by a doctor entering the room.

"How is he?" Sami asked standing up quickly as she swiped away a tear.

"He got through the surgery but its still touch and go," the doctor replied.

"Can I see him?"

The doctor simply nodded.

_What hurts the most  
Was being so close  
And having so much to say  
And watching you walk away  
And never knowing  
What could have been  
And not seeing that loving you  
Is what I was tryin' to do_

Sami walked into EJ's hospital room to see him lying in the bed staring at the wall. She walked over to the chair next to the bed and sat down not saying anything because the truth was she didn't know what to say. EJ finally turned his attention on her.

"We can't do this anymore,"

Sami gave him a confused look.

They couldn't do what anymore? Be Friends? Fight? Love each other?

Her last thought made tears want to spring to her eyes.

"What?"

"You know what I mean Samantha," EJ said his eyes emotionless to a person that didn't know him that well but Sami could tell he hated doing this.

"I'm sorry but I don't,"

"You know very well What I mean, I've told you and showed you that I loved you more times than I can count but all that's ended up doing is putting you and our children in danger I don't want what happen tonight at that warehouse to happen again," EJ clarified.

"You're giving up too easy," Sami protested.

"No, I just love you enough to let you go,"

EJ could see the stubbornness and determination in Sami's eyes.

She didn't say anything she just leaned forward and planted a kiss on EJ's lips that she was sure would make his head spin.

_It's hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go  
But I'm doin' It  
It's hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I'm alone  
Still Harder  
Getting up, getting dressed, livin' with this regret  
But I know if I could do it over  
I would trade give away all the words that I saved in my heart  
That I left unspoken_

When they finally pulled away EJ spoke up.

"Samantha I…I can't,"

Sami sighed in sheer frustration.

"You're being stubborn, you think you're helping me by doing this but you're doing the total opposite. You're hurting me because you're giving up on this and I…" Sami let her sentence trail because she realized she was admitting what she probably knew all along.

_What hurts the most  
Is being so close  
And having so much to say  
And watching you walk away  
And never knowing  
What could have been  
And not seeing that loving you  
Is what I was trying to do_

"You what? What is it Samantha?"

Sami shook her head.

"It's nothing. Forget it,"

"No, you were going to say something so say it," EJ said brushing Sami's hand with his fingers.

"It was nothing," Sami said pulling her hand away.

"Just forget it,"

With that Sami got up and walked out of the room leaving EJ to stare after her.

As Sami walked down the hallway with hot tears streaming down her cheeks she wondered to herself

_What did I just give up?_


End file.
